Life is a test. We are not present on earth to just exist; we are here to learn. Life is a lesson. Love one another unconditionally. Love thyself unconditionally. We spend our whole lives learning to do this. Some succeed and some never have a clue. I'm trying. Love my fellow man. Don't react and don't always have to be right. This is one I'll have to work on for the rest of my life. Appreciate each day and recognize positive and negative as a part of life's experiences. Look around me and see life at it's best. The joys of living come as you strive to achieve your dreams. Its the quality of each day that is important, not the distant dream once achieved. Teach and nurture my children. You can never give them too much love. -Randa Jex 1/1/94

Saturday, November 26

Turkey Trot

This morning we walked (well I strolled) down to the river to cheer on Papa in the Thanksgiving Turkey Trot Run. I insisted that Mommy make Papa a sign and cheer him across the finish line. He had a great time and was one of the first 10 people to finish the race, he even beat all the turkeys.

Mommy, Grammy and I watched from the sidelines this year since Mommy can't workout post surgery

I was so nervous I could barely peak out of my blanket

Don't tell Papa but I took a quick nap while waiting on him.

My buddy, Molly! We had a great time chatting about the diapered life! She is a cutie, I think I might date her in a few years!

But I woke up right in time to see him cross the finish line! I was so proud of my Papa!

Run Papa Run!

Mommy was trying to put my silly paci in my mouth, otherwise I'd be smiling!

Tuesday, November 15

What??? Surgery?? What??

I wish I was here to report that I was going under the knife to get that coveted post pregnancy tummy tuck and boob job but it's not nearly that exciting.

If you know me well...or have been in a conversation with me lately in a noisy place than you have heard me say "What?" and then I probably refer to “my good ear and my bad ear”. Stand on my left side and we are all good, stand on my right and it's a crap shoot whether or not I can hear what you're talking about... and on occasion I might use this to my advantage just so I can claim "oh I didn't hear you tell me no, Zach". It's not really as bad as I make it out to be but with any background noise, hearing a whisper is almost impossible.

2 years ago I went to an ENT and discovered I had Otosclerosis, a condition in which spongy bone has hardened around the base of the stapes- the innermost bone in the ear. If the stapes is fixed in position (my condition), rather than being normally mobile, then a conductive hearing loss results. In 2009 it was minor and the Dr. said we would not need surgery or a hearing aid since my other ear is perfect and that ear wasn’t too bad. Then after I had Austin I noticed it was worse. So just in case you thought pregnancy only made your waist change you are sorely mistaken. It also can change your hearing, vision, shoe size, hair, skin, and the most gives you a body straight out of Nation Geographic saggy skin edition. BUMMER! Good thing I have 14lbs of cuteness at home that makes everything worth it.
This is a picture of the inner ear....the tan area is where I will have the procedure.

In light of noticing additional hearing loss, I went to a specialist and they confirmed that the Otosclerosis has gotten much worse and surgery is the best option and the “do nothing” approach that we originally opted for is no longer desirable….for me or Zach since I am constantly saying WHAT? WHAT?? Not to mention he hears the baby monitor long before I do if I am sleeping on my “good ear”. So this surgery is going to improve my hearing thus improving Zach’s sleep. This coming Monday I am having a procedure called a Stapendectomy where they go in and place a micro prosthesis (see picture below) in my inner ear that makes up for the hearing loss and will be a permanent fix. A stapedectomy does not require any incisions on the outside of the body, as the entire procedure is performed through the ear canal.

The tan bone is the Stape and the Christmas Ornament hanger looking thingamajig is the micro prosthesis.

I was totally cool with the procedure until I did what any inquiring mind would do...I googled it. After hours of internet research, I am officially scared to death that next Tuesday I will be deaf, paralized, or dead....yup I am worried that an outpatient surgery might kick my bucket. Wow thanks INTERNET. Oh but there is ONE silver lining, it's free thank to Austin! We met all of our deductibles this year with the delivery so this surgery is on the house.

All kidding aside, prayers are welcomed and appreciated. Going into the week of Thanksgiving I have to say I am thankful for science and medicine. I am thankful for Dr. John J.Shea Jr. for inventing something so tiny that goes inside my head and allows me to hear my little boy whisper his prayers at night and deliver his Valedictorian speech at Ole Miss in 2034. I am thankful for my wonderful husband that is going to be there with me through the entire thing and thankful he hasn't divorced me for how many times I have said "what". I am thankful for Mom and Dad for being amazing grandparents to Austin and taking care of him while I am out of town and for Mom's generous heart. She is staying at my house to care for the baby 'round-the-clock while I recover and Zach works since I am forbidden to lift anything (which includes my sweet baby boy) for 2 weeks.

Please pray for the surgeon's steady hand and my tolerance of the pain and discomfort for the weeks following the surgery. And pray for my heart as it breaks everytime I want to pick up my sweet baby (12 billion times a day) and realized that I can't.

I'm sure gonna miss this :(

Thursday, November 3

They grow up too fast

As a kid, I always laughed at people when they look at kids and said "oh they grow up way too fast" we were actors on a soap opera that age 4 years over the summer. You tune back in after missing a few episodes and Sammy who was 9 and learning to ride a bicycle is now married with 6 kids. Well, now I get it.
This morning one of my best friends in the world gave birth to her 2nd daughter. Around 1am I had picture texts rolling in introducing me to her sweet little girl and as I looked at that tiny baby in her arms, I thought...."oh they grow up way too fast". So this morning when I got up to feed Austin, instead of putting him back to bed for an hour while I got ready for work, I just sat there for a few extra minutes. I held him tight and rocked him back to sleep and I can barely believe that this little boy in my arms that now laughs, holds his own bottle, and recognizes familiar faces was that same tiny baby I held in the hospital 3 1/2 months ago.
I have learned how to live in the moment and cherish every second with this little one. Even last night when he was screaming for no apparent reason, I held him close and thanked God for that sound.
holding his bottle

His new thing is he reaches out and touches your face when you talk to him. It's the sweetest thing ever and pretty much melts my heart.